Thursday, September 29, 2011

Quickies: Fields of Gold

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You crapper be live with sexed attack for sabotaging your partner’s condoms. Unless you’re meet breaking them in like a good Samaritan, which is how I explained it to the judge. (Jezebel)

Anna Faris in some earnest fuck-me shoe on David Letterman. (Celeb Slam)

Chris Brown is smooooooth. (The Blemish)

Rihanna abandons the Northern island cereal fields and goes grubbing on the streets in her newborn video. (Hollywood Rag)

Mandy Moore masturbating with a cucumber. I prefer spaghetti mash myself. (G Celeb)

Kim Kardashian confronts digit of her haters. I hate myself for typing that. See how it all comes flooded circle? (Seriously? OMG)

And speaking of Kim Kardashian, guess who wore a see-through shirt to go bowling? One hint: she’s a giant whore. (The Grumpiest)

Chace Crawford’s marijuana charges are dropped. When asked for comment, the DA said, “He’s white! What did you expect?” (Bitten & Bound)

Elisabetta Canalis strength be soured Dancing with the Stars for now, but these pics of her in her tiny costumes will live on forever. (Moe Jackson)

Jessica Alba explains why she named her girl Haven instead of “Membranes” or “Amniotic Sac.” (Dlisted)

Ladies and gentleman, earmark me to inform the subtleties of a good anti-joke. (Caveman Circus)

I’ve got sextet text for you: Detroit’s Booty Lounge stripper tailgating bus. Do with it what you will. (Busted Coverage)

Olivia Wilde looks terrible with blond hair. Like Christina Applegate during her “Married with Children” days. (Use My Computer)

Ashley Tisdale in a “Toddler & Tiaras” spoof. (Pop Crunch)

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