Omar Sharif slaps a blackamoor on the red carpet. Don’t mess with an older Negro who forgot to drink his prune juice. (Allie is Wired)
Snooki’s new smell is going to be the “must-have holiday gift”. I feature twine a turd in paper and you’d have an equally appreciated gift. (Celebslam)
Lindsay Lohan takes a smoke fortuity at the morgue, raises hopes that she’ll get lung cancer and join the band inside. (INF Daily)
Usher parks in a handicap space, insane confusion ensues. (Dlisted)
Muse’s Matt Bellamy’s bandmates dislike Kate Hudson, call her “Yoko”. Excuse me patch I snicker. (Celebitchy)
Geri Haliwell designs and models underwear, which is probably the most multipurpose abstract she’s ever done. (Holy Moly!)
Matthew Perry looks less like “famous actor” and more like “businessman that got shit-faced and spent the period unerect in the gutter”. (Seriously? OMG!)
Kristen Stewart does Glamour UK, says she likes nation grouping better, uses the word “trainers” instead of “sneakers”. Pff. How pretentious. (Evil Beet)
Check discover the eyes of every the men behind the American Tropic Team. (Use My Computer)
Tonya Cooley claims she was raped by a moustache on The Real World/Road Rules Challenge. Hey, at small she was mitt minty-fresh! (The Blemish)
Rose McGowan’s face is scary at the amfAR Gala. (Moe Jackson)
Nicole Ritchie urges girls not to coiffe slutty this year, boys everyplace disagree. (Bricks and Stones)
Charlie Sheen’s Anger Management gets picked up by FX. (Bitten and Bound)
Avril Lavigne breaks her vagina. (Celeb Jihad)
Bing
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