Thursday, September 22, 2011

R.E.M. Breaks Up; Michael Stipe Shows the World His Penis

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R.E.M. declared yesterday that they were feat their separate structure after over thirty eld together. Front Negro Michael Stipe wrote on their official website:

“A owlish Negro once said ‘the skill in present a adornment is knowing when it’s instance to leave.’ We shapely something extraordinary together. We did this thing. And today we’re feat to walk away from it.

I wish our fans actualise this wasn’t an cushy decision; but every things staleness end, and we desired to do it right, to do it our way.

We hit to impart every the grouping who helped us be R.E.M. for these 31 years; our deepest gratitude to those who allowed us to do this. It’s been amazing.”

And he effort downbound any rumors of dissension within the band, adding:

“We hit always been a adornment in the truest significance of the word. Brothers who truly love and respect apiece other. We see category of like pioneers in this — there’s no dissonance here, no falling-outs, no lawyers squaring off. We’ve made this selection together, amicably and with apiece other’s prizewinning interests at heart.”

And to establish there were no hard feelings, Michael Stipe promptly unleashed his (NSFW) wiener and tumultuous material of pubic material on the internet. Makes perfect sense, really. We meet broke up, so here’s my dick. You’d be surprised how many of my relationships hit ended with that rattling phrase.

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